Tenderize: to make tender, as by pounding or by a chemical process or treatment.
My husband’s family has taken a pounding this week with the passing of my father-in-law. We’ve been talking a lot about the legacy he left, but some of that legacy is yet to come. Just as we are seeing the effects of his life, we are also experiencing the effects of his death.
If you’ve ever had a loved one die, you remember the feeling of first receiving the news. It’s like a kick to the stomach, a punch to the face, and a blow to the heart all at once. Your mind, body and spirit take a beating.
Alongside the tears, I’ve witnessed a “tenderizing” in many family members. Suddenly everyone is much kinder to one another, more attuned to each other’s needs, and more compassionate and caring. There are more hugs and more “I love you”s. There is an abundance of grace and forgiveness.
However, it takes more than a pounding to produce a palatable piece of meat. We’ve all been seasoned by the love and support of friends, and now we will go through the fire of grief. I pray that when we are done, we will be “the aroma of Christ among those who are being saved and those who are perishing” (2 Corinthians 2:15). And hopefully, if we willingly accept the pounding, we will continue to be tender.
